No. 12, February 20, 2009

Ape apes Poe

It’s not exactly life imitating art, but when I heard about the violent rampage of Travis the chimpanzee in Connecticut, The Murders in the Rue Morgue immediately came to mind.

This short story by Edgar A. Poe – whose 200^th birthday would have been on January 16 this year – is set in 19^th century Paris and introduces C. Auguste Dupin, one of the earliest literary detectives.

Dupin and the story’s narrator are reclusive aesthetes, but they become interested in the brutal killing of a woman and her daughter in a house on the Rue Morgue. The corpse of the daughter, scratched and bruised, is found thrust up a chimney, while that of the mother is found “so fearfully mutilated. . . as scarcely to retain any semblance of humanity.”

To make a longish story short, despite its puzzling features Dupin solves the case after examining the scene of the crime and applying his analytic abilities. The women have been killed by an orangutan that has climbed in through their window after escaping in an agitated state from the sailor who brought it from the East Indies.

In the actual incident, one woman was left with severe injuries to her face and hands rather than two being killed, but it can be imagined that the frenzy involved in the attacks would be similar. In the story, the orangutan is safely recaptured and winds up in the Paris zoo, as opposed to the unfortunate Travis dying in a hail of police bullets like John Dillinger.

What is quite different, and suggests John Collier’s His Monkey Wife: or married to a Chimp in reverse rather than The Murders in The Rue Morgue is owner Sandra Herold’s relationship with the 14-year-old chimp.

Her beloved companion, he rode around in cars, ate top-notch meals at the table and drank wine out of long-stemmed glasses – which prompts the question of whether he preferred red or white. According to some accounts they also had baths together and slept in the same bed -- which isn’t so much different than a lot of people treat their cats and dogs, but because chimpanzees are human-like but not quite there it makes people queasy.

Mackenzie Porter, a columnist for the Sun newspapers in their early days, used to rail against widespread anthropomorphism – attribution of human sentiments to animals – as being a sign of the decadence of contemporary. Of course Porter pretty much saw everything as a symptom of societal decay, but it can sometimes be dangerous.

No. 11, February 13

It’s Valentine’s Day all over

Irked by your favourite restaurant pushing a pricey special dinner menu for Valentine’s Day? Consider Le Bristol. The grand hotel on the rue du Faubourg Saint-Honoré in Paris is offering a Valentine’s Day special in the Restaurant Le Bristol Paris.
Lovers can dine either in the winter restaurant, a former private theatre with Regency-style Hungarian oak panelling and Baccarat crystal chandeliers, or the summer restaurant, which features views of the hotel's magnificent garden.
Head chef Eric Frechon, who is expected to be awarded three stars in this year's Michelin Red Guide, has devised a menu comprising: cauliflower mousse with a sherry-infused red onion jelly and haddock foam; stuffed macaroni with black truffles, artichokes and duck foie gras, gratinéed with mature parmesan; sole "from the sand" stuffed with chanterelle mushrooms in a fishbone essence with vin jaune; pigeon glazed with honey and lemon, with a compote of cumin-flavoured onions and fennel and sauce diable; sparkling mango with lemon sorbet; Meringue soufflé with raspberries, coconut milk and ginger elixir; petits fours and chocolates; and coffee.
The price is 350€ ($556) per person, sans beverages; or just about $80 for each of seven courses (unless you include coffee as a course). And then there is the cost of the Champagne . . .

Back to the future with the A.P.P.?

From 1917 to 1932 the A.P.P., Alberta Provincial Police, took care of policing in the province, outside the major centres. The RCMP have performed that role since then.
Does Premier Ed Stelmach now want to do away with day-to-day RCMP policing in Alberta and bring back the A.P.P.?
Recently some former RCMP duties in some areas have been taken over by officers from the provincial Sheriff’s Branch, prompting speculation that this may be the first step toward replacing the Mounties.
On February 13, Kent Hehr, Alberta Liberal shadow solicitor general and shadow minister of justice, called on Stelmach to publicly state if he intends to replace the RCMP.
“By removing RCMP officers from traffic-related policing duties in selected areas, the government is causing Albertans to wonder if the province is gauging public reaction to the move. Is this the first step to creating a provincial police force?” said Hehr.
He pointed to a letter written in 2001 by Ted Morton, now a member of the cabinet, advocating an end to the RCMP policing contract and creation of a provincial police force.
Hehr: “Has Ted Morton swayed the Premier into getting rid of the RCMP? Come clean premier, are you intending to replace the RCMP?”
He stated he will oppose any move towards granting the Alberta sheriffs additional powers of arrest.

Hard times indeed

Getting a loan to finance a boat purchase is much tougher in the U.S. these days, according to recreational boat owners group BoatU.S. Many banks have dropped out of the market and “gone are the days of ‘relaxed guidelines’ and ‘no documentation’ loans.” For would-be boat buyers in tough times the group provides tips on getting loans that include ensuring their credit is good, having enough cash for the down payment and filling out the loan application properly.

World o’ beans

It’s a blast of nostalgia for the UK, where Heinz is running a TV advertising campaign for its canned baked beans that features the return of the “Beanz Meanz Heinz” slogan that was hugely popular in the 70s. According to creator Maurice Drake he came up with the slogan “after two pints in a pub in London.” More than $600 million worth of canned baked beans are sold annually in the UK, where beans on toast are a national staple and beans are an essential part of the full English breakfast (along with eggs, bacon, sausage, baked tomato, sometimes mushrooms and black pudding, and toast or fried bread).

No. 10, February 2, 2009

A brief note on memoirs

Everyone should write a memoir. In setting their experiences down, people are liable to examine them and their motives. This provides a chance to make more sense of their lives, and may act as a spur to future personal growth. That's one aspect of it. There is also the sense of accomplishment that virtually everyone will feel about accomplishing such a task. Perhaps they will find writing satisfying and go on to do more.

Certainly not everyone is going to produce an account that will be of great interest to others because of the important roles they played on the stage of life or because their lives have been full of exciting events and incidents. The interest for others in accounts of quieter lives will be a close observation of what it was like to be living in certain places at certain times -- which could bring to the surface little-known or forgotten facts, important observations and so on -- and the ways in which people responded to their experiences. It may be best when writing to focus on a portion of life that has been particularly interesting or unusual, rather than attempting a complete autobiography.

While publication is highly unlikely, if the completed memoir is ever removed from the desk drawer it may find more readers than expected. The story of anyone's life can be very interesting. It's easy if the life has been full of events and excitement -- anybody could write it. To really make something of the life story of someone whose experiences have been undramatic, it may require a master. However that doesn't mean that people shouldn't make the attempt for their own benefit at least.